Sunday Scribblings - Sports - 2/13/09

When I saw the prompt was sports, there were several ways I could go. I could talk about how my life has been defined and enhanced by sports. I was a competitor in my younger years,
then became a coach, critic, and motivator, as my children participated in a variety of sports,



and now am pretty much reduced to being a fan, unless you count golf and bowling as sports.


My poor daughter, Carly, by virtue of living with three guys, had no choice but to play sports as well.



Lucky for her, she was a good athlete, but in high school switched to cheer leading. Carly was good enough at that to compete in the national championships at Disney World.

She has continued this competitive family tradition with her son, Carson. She has exposed him to several team sports to let him discover which ones he enjoys, if any.

My granddaughter Maris has already shown some talent. If nothing else she has learned to pose like an athlete.

I know a lot of bloggers consider themselves academics that are above sports and will predictably rail against athletic folly but they were and are a very valuable glue that helped to hold a broken family together. Don't get me wrong, we did not obsess with sports at the expense of academics. All three of my children graduated with honors from college. I was always of the belief that the best way to keep kids out of trouble is by keeping them busy with activities. In a military community, sports were always available. All three of my kids possessed aptitude for physical competition. After hauling their trophies all over the world, I gave most of them away to the Special Olympics, keeping only those with special meaning.
I could have written about that but I decided not to.

I could have talked about how professional sports have been ruined for me by the money, drugs, attitude of the players, and corruption. Here are a few facts that will illustrate my disillusionment with where professional sports have gone.

4th place in a single major PGA tournament pays more money than I have earned in my entire life (I checked my social security statement).

2nd place at a major PGA tournament pays more than Arnold Palmer made in his career.

Alex Rodriguez makes more money in a 3 game weekend series than I have made in my entire life.

In 2008, playing in only 6 events, Tiger Woods won more prize money than Jack Nicklaus, the greatest golfer of all-time, earned in his entire career.

David Beckham made $13,000 per each minute he played for the Los Angeles Galaxy. He was paid $32.5 million dollars and played a total of 2,500 minutes.

Carl Pavano was paid $40 million by the New York Yankees and pitched a total of 26 games, winning only 9 of them. That is over $4.4 million per win.

The minimum wage of a major league baseball player who is a bench warmer and may never actually get on the field is $390,000.

The minimum wage of an NFL rookie, who may never get into a game is $295,000.

The minimum wage of an NBA rookie, who may never get into a game is $442,114.

The minimum wage of an NHL rookie, who may never get into a game is $450,000.

Is it any wonder kids are drawn to steroids in order to compete at a high level?

But I decided not to write about that aspect of sports either.

What I have decided to write about a sporting event that I recently attended that restored a bit of my faith in professional sports. Though I am not a hockey fan by any means, my daughter and grandson recently treated me to a professional hockey game in Winston Salem. The Twin City Cyclones participate in the Southern Professional Hockey League. Yes, they have hockey in the south. I was surprised too.
It is, however, the absolute bottom of the professional hockey barrel. These kids play their hearts out with absolutely no hope of ever lacing them up in the National Hockey League. They are definitely not doing it for the money or glory. They play in front of about 1,000 fans. The league enforces a $5,600 a week salary cap which is split between the 18 players on the roster. The league minimum for Canadian players is $275 (hear that NHL). They can pay Americans less than that (we evidently suck at Hockey). Players are provided a place to live and some local restaurants give them discounts and that is it. And for that they get the absolute stuffing beat out of them. They undoubtedly play for the love of the game.

As a non-hockey fan, I was entertained every bit as much as if I were watching the top tier of the NHL and had a lot better seats. They have a mascot, though I am not entirely sure what it is. It is some kind of blue bird. How that relates to a cyclone is anybody's guess. But it nearly got ran over by the Zamboni, further adding to my enjoyment.

We attended on Humane Society Night and if you brought a dog your admission was free. They had dog shows on a carpet rolled out on the ice between each period. Skooter would not have approved and would have made a scene. The Cyclones even gave my grandson a puck and would have autographed it if we had desired.

Sunday Scribblings - "Ask"- 8/10/08

This week's Sunday Scribblings prompt is "Ask". I came up with this:

Every four years the world comes together to determine which countries have developed the most undetectable performance enhancing drugs. They call this event, the summer Olympics. As the 2008 version is underway, I feel the need to ask a few questions.

In 1980, in my opinion the most spineless president the United States has ever known, Jimmy Carter, boycotted the Moscow Olympics. The reason was that the Russians invaded Afghanistan and even though they were getting their butts kicked, our allies (we had more then) and us wanted them out. Several other nations joined us in the boycott. In retaliation, the Warsaw Pact returned the favor in 1984.

So why are we embracing the Chinese, whose human rights record is one of the worst in history? They torture and kill their dissidents. Could it be that we are overlooking China’s malevolence because they are the largest emerging consumer market and it is to everyone’s best interest to promote their economy, which the Olympics surely does? The Chinese bought the Olympics, just as the Mormons in Salt Lake City did in the winter of 2002.


A lot of us Americans, who have enjoyed freedoms and excesses that most of the world only dreams of, don’t really consider what the loss of them would mean. It is very popular to criticize the government, particularly the President of the United States. I do it myself. What if I wrote in this blog, “George Bush is a shitty president” and my door was knocked down minutes later, my computer seized, and I was incarcerated for the rest of my life? That is the situation in China.

I saw where Iraq was banned from these Olympics. They have only won one bronze medal in their history and that was in 1960. Why bother to ban them? No one notices whether they are there or not. I see they have since removed the ban. I am sure the world is trembling now that this Olympic powerhouse is back in competition. If there was an event that included dodging land mines or detecting car bombs, Iraq would win gold. But I don't think their way of life is conducive to training for saber fencing.

While I am on the subject of the Olympics, why do women’s volleyball teams wear normal athletic attire but the beach volleyball players wear an outfit that would get them arrested at many American beaches? Does a wedgie make one more aerodynamic? Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy watching this event, but I have no idea how or when they score or which team wins. Nor do I care.




I also love women’s gymnastics, but it is the only time in my life I feel a bit like a pedophile. Again, I do not track the scoring. While on the subject of women's gymnastics, I have to ask: why is Mary Lou Retten held in such high esteem? She won gold when 11 of the top 12 women gymnasts were busy boycotting the 1984 Los Angeles Olympics. She essentially beat nobody. Yet, her name comes up and her commentary is solicited each time women are competing. She was even featured on a Wheaties box. Talk about right place at the right time. This is just like Byron Nelson winning 11 consecutive PGA tournament events in 1945, when all the other golfers were fighting in World War II. Not impressive.

I used to watch track and field but like my beloved baseball, I can no longer be certain whether I am watching a great athlete or a great chemist. Marion Jones and Barry Bonds among many others have ruined these sports for me. If in a few years we find that Michael Phelps was anabolically enhanced, I will be greatly saddened, but unfortunately, not surprised.

Why are sports like synchronized swimming (which should be featured on “So You Think You Can Dance”) and table tennis Olympic sports? Then why not NASCAR and Texas Hold-em?

I have to stop now; there are groups of Chinese men, synchronized swimmers, and Jimmy Carter beating at my door.