Sunday Scribblings - Solace - 7/27/08

The Sunday Scribblings’ prompt this week is “solace”. I could write something romantic about the ocean or southern summer nights providing solace, but that would not be entirely true. I do not take solace from religion, as so many do. I take solace from food. This may seem innocent enough, but food addiction is just as deadly as heroin. It would probably be all right if I was comforted by celery or sprouts, but unfortunately, I am soothed by only the most unhealthy of foods. As a doctor once said, “if it tastes good, spit it out.”

I love pasta, and my favorite is the most deadly of all, spaghetti carbonara. For those unfamiliar, it is basically pasta loaded with bacon, eggs, and cheese.

I am particularly fond of grilling a good steak,

fried foods,

and shellfish dipped in butter.

I love dessert.

If someone addicted to crack is a crack head, I am a grub head.

The problem, other than the obvious blocking of my arteries, is that the comfort is short-lived. I am depressed so I eat, then I am dejected because I eat.

I was going to write more, but I made myself hungry.

55 Flash Fiction Friday - Ladies Man - 7/18/08

I hadn't written one of these in a while. The challenge here is to tell a story using only 55 words. Try it. It is not as easy as it sounds. This one is about a guy we all know.

The club was emptying. Women that caught his eye were paired with someone. As the cliché promised, his hesitation had caused him to lose. Even through beer goggles, she was substandard, but, any port in a storm. He approached her confidently. “How would you like to dance?” She sized him up, “No thanks” she sneered.

Sunday Scribblings - My Oldest Friend - 7/13/08

When I read this week's prompt, "My Oldest Friend," it was the easiest prompt to respond to in the year or so that I have been writing Sunday Scribblings. Only one name came to mind. His name is Marc Dorendorf. We met in the seventh grade in 1964. We maintained our friendship throughout high school, playing sports together. I am number 44 and Marc is number 20. Our coach looked extremely drunk and thinking back I wouldn't blame him. We were better at baseball.

His mom and dad became my surrogate parents. I spent a lot of time as a welcome guest in their home. We would hang out at his place after baseball practice, gorging ourselves with Velveeta and ham sandwiches in his basement rec room.

After high school, we both attending the University of Idaho for a year. We both left school and went to work at the lead smelter of the Bunker Hill Company until we got our draft notices early in 1972. I married in June before departing for the Air Force in August. Marc was a groomsman in my wedding. My son Josh's middle name is Marc.

Marc elected to go into the Army for the minimum 2 years. He was spared Vietnam and spent his enlistment in Germany. I, on the other hand, spent 20 years in the Air Force. My experiences and family have been documented in previous posts. Marc met his future wife, Debbie, in Paris during his Army tour in Europe. After discharge, he returned to the University of Idaho and using his veteran's educational benefits, earned an accounting degree. He has a very successful CPA firm in Spokane, Washington. He and Debbie raised two great daughters.

Through the years, no matter where I was stationed, I received a family photo Christmas card and a newsletter. I followed his life and the growth of his family through snapshots in time. I have included some of those snapshots here. I have always carried them with me. They are not in perfect order due to my lack of computer skills, but they still chart the growth of his daughters and acquisition of a son-in-law, soon to be two. They have a beautiful home on a hill south of Spokane which, as you can see, has been home to several domestic animals. It is also been a refuge for countless deer through the years.






As you can see, through the years Marc's hair has advanced from black, through grey, to a shade of blue usually reserved for residents of Del Boca Vista, Florida (obscure Seinfeld reference).

We never completely lost touch and on my rare visits back to the Pacific Northwest, we always get together. 

This week, Marc informed me of the passing of his dad, Marvin, two days before his 81st birthday. He died on July 5th in the presence of his loving family.

Above are his 1945 Kellogg High School graduation photo (I see a little Jerry Lee Lewis happening there) and a photo as he looked the last time I saw him. I am not as sad as I am happy to have known him. He had a great run.
The memories that news brought up to me made the timing of this prompt perfect. Spending 20 years as a nomad in the military does not lend itself to establishing and maintaining long-term friendships. I greatly value this one.  I have other friends that I have known longer but as you will see, we never lost touch. 

Thursday Thirteen - 13 Jobs illegal Aliens Will Not Take From You - 7/10/08

A lot of people are concerned about illegal Immigrants taking jobs away from American citizens. The following is a partial list of occupations that are not threatened by the influx from Mexico. For job security, I recommend training in one of these professions:

1) Air Traffic Controller

2) Rocket Scientist

3) Brain Surgeon

4) Professional Basketball Player

5) Pharmacist

6) CEO of Microsoft

7) Airline Pilot

8) Actuary

9) Certified Public Accountant

10) Nuclear Physicist

11) Judge

12) Investment Banker

13) Professor of English Lit

Postscript: If your job can be taken away by someone who doesn't speak English, you have a shitty job.

Wordless Wednesday - 7/9/08

Thursday Thirteen - Things You Might Not Know - 6/26/08

This week's list is 13 things you might not know. Once you read it, you will know everything I know.

1. The book "Gadsby" written in 1939 by Earnest Wright does not contain a single word with the letter "e" in it. This is it: Gadsby

2. The heart of a blue whale is the size of an automobile.

3. Earth is the only planet not named after a God.

4. The metal can was invented 48 years before the can opener. Instructions on early cans called for a hammer and chisel.

5. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi never won a Nobel Peace Prize but Yasser Arafat did.

6. Istanbul Turkey is the only city in the world that is located on two continents.

7. Colgate faced a big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. In some Spanish dialects, Colgate means "go hang yourself."

8. The Olympic, Titanic's sister ship, sailed the seas for 25 years.

9. The snap made by the tip of a bullwhip results from exceeding the speed of sound. It is a tiny sonic boom.

10. Watermelon, which is 92% water originated from the Kalahari Desert in Africa

11. The name Thailand literally means "land of the free." It is the only southeast Asian country to never be occupied and ruled by a European power.

12. Next to Warsaw, Chicago has the largest Polish population in the world

13. The hymn "Amazing Grace" was written by a slave ship captain

Wordless Wednesday - 6/18/08

Thursday 13 - Clean Jokes - 6/12/08

These are 13, totally clean jokes that I think are funny. Some are very old, that does not make them less funny.

1. A blind man was out walking with his seeing-eye dog when suddenly the animal paused and wet the man's leg. Bending down, the blind man stretched out his hand and offered the dog a biscuit. Having watched what happened, a bystander said, "What a kind man you are, rewarding him? That dog just peed on your leg!"
"Not kind," said the blind man, "I am trying to find his head so I can kick him in the butt."

2. A visitor to a college campus paused to admire the new Hemingway Hall. "It's a pleasure to see a building named for Ernest Hemingway."

"Actually," said the guide, "it's named for Joshua Hemingway. No relation."

"Oh? Was Joshua Hemingway a writer also?"

"Yes, indeed. He wrote a check."

3. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

4. Bert took his black lab to the vet. "Doctor," he said sadly, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to cut off my dog's tail."
The vet stepped back, "Bert, why should I do such a terrible thing?"
"Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome."

5. A customer was continually bothering the waiter in a restaurant; first, he'd asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down because he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour.
Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, walking back and forth and never once getting angry. So finally, a second customer asked why didn't they just throw out the pest.
"Oh I don't care." said the waiter with a smile. "We don't even have an air conditioner."

6. A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.” The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”

7. When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 C. The Russians used a pencil.

8. Two tourists were driving through Wisconsin. As they were approaching Oconomowoc, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town’s name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the blonde employee. “Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are… very slowly?The blonde girl leaned over the counter and said, Burrrrrr, gerrrrrr, Kiiiing.”

9. Bob received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown, with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren't expletives were rude. Bob tried to change the bird by constantly saying polite words, playing soft music... anything he could think of. Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird, and the bird got worse. He shook the bird, and the bird got madder and more rude. Finally, in a moment of desperation, Bob put the parrot in the freezer. For a few moments, he heard it swearing, squawking, kicking and screaming. Then, suddenly, there was absolute quiet. Bob was frightened that he might have actually hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door.The parrot calmly stepped out onto Bob's extended arm and said: "I'm sorry that I offended you with my language and I ask your forgiveness. I will endeavour to correct my behaviour." Bob was astounded and was about to ask what had changed when the parrot continued: "May I ask what the chicken did?"

10. A young man called directory assistance. "Hello, operator, I would like the telephone number for Mary Jones in Phoenix, Arizona."
"There are multiple listings for Mary Jones in Phoenix," the operator replied. "Do you have a street name?"
The young man hesitated, and then said, "Well, most people call me Ice Man."

11. A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender says, "You're quite a celebrity around here. We've even got a drink named after you." The grasshopper says, "You've got a drink named Steve?"

12. Proudly showing off his new apartment to a friend late one night, the drunk led the way to the bedroom, where there was a big brass gong.
"What's that brass gong for?" asked the friend.
"It's not a gong. It's a talking clock," the drunk replied.
"A talking clock? How's it work?"
"Watch this," said the drunk. He took a hammer, gave the gong an ear-shattering pound and waited. Someone on the other side of the wall screamed: "Hey, you jerk. It's 3:00 in the morning!"

13. A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says ‘What the hell was that all about?"

Wordless Wednesday - Redneck Movers - 6/11/08

I can't leave this totally wordless. This vehicle is driving on I-77 in Charlotte. The mattress is secured by only a single piece of twine. The photo is poor because I used my antique cell phone.

Sunday Scribblings - "My Nights" Writer's Island - "Unexpected"

I had originally written a piece for this week about what I do in the summer evenings. But it was very boring and read like a Myrtle Beach Chamber of Commerce ad. So I decided to write about one single night at Myrtle Beach, Saturday night. That is why my post is going up late.

I went to see a band called Third Eye Blind. It was a free outdoor concert in conjunction with the annual Sun Fun Festival. I had heard a few of their songs but knew very little about this group other than in my opinion they had one of the best, most original, names ever for a band.

I got up very close to the stage as I have often done over many years of concert attendance. I was easily the oldest person in the area I was standing in by 25 years. There were enough blunts burning to give me a contact high and add to my enjoyment of the music. It was fun to see the twenty-somethings singing along with every song, as I did when I went to see The Stones "final" concert, in London, so many years ago.

Unexpectedly, I thoroughly enjoyed the concert. I was so impressed by their musical abilities that I came back home and read up on them. The lead guitar player, Tony Fredianelli, was as good as I have ever heard. His guitar solos were amazing. The lead singer and wordsmith, Stephan Jenkins, has penned some incredible lyrics. He has great stage presence and an ability to bond with his energetic audience. He projects an honesty that seems to be missing in many performers. They ended their show with a shortened cover of Stairway to Heaven. Jenkins’ voice sounded very much like Robert Plant used to sound. He nailed it. So many bands sound great in the studio, where their shortcomings can be enhanced by technology, but sound terrible live. Third Eye Blind is actually better live than on CD. Their energy cannot be felt from a studio recording. It was a very memorable night. You are listening to one of their songs right now. Enjoy!

The night before I had stopped to see another concert at the same outside venue from a band that should have been more age appropriate for me, the Catalinas. I managed to listen to about four songs before I decided to go find something fun to do. I think I was much too young to enjoy their music.

To me, they sounded like a very bad karaoke. If I ever have trouble sleeping I will purchase one of their recordings. It will be much cheaper than sleeping pills. They had begun performing in the late fifties and I think their voices deserted them sometime during the seventies. In their defense, they are probably one of the many groups for which the name has endured through the years with a revolving door of personnel. The Catalinas I heard probably had few, if any, original members. They are one of the many “beach music” bands that exist pretty much only in the Carolinas. Luckily most people that enjoy this music will be dead soon. Hey, I am joking here. Remember, “Writing With a Smirk?”

Thursday 13 - Songs I Never Pass On - 6/5/08

I have several hundred songs on the playlist that randomly plays on the IPOD in my car. Depending upon my mood I often skip songs as soon as the intro begins. These are 13 songs that I never pass on. I am never out of the mood to hear any of them. There are many more but these came to mind first:

1. Bed of Roses – Bon Jovi



2. You Shook Me All Night Long – AC/DC



3. Pride and Joy – Stevie Ray Vaughn



4. Nessun Dorma – Luciano Pavarotti – one of the highlights of my life is seeing him live in Hyde Park in London from right in front of the stage – for free (London Rocks)



5. I Don’t Want To Miss a Thing – Aerosmith



6. Faithfully – Journey



7. Can’t Let Go – Lucinda Williams



8. Cry – Angie Aparo



9. Eruption – Van Halen



10. Born To Run – Bruce Springsteen



11. The Flame – Cheap Trick



12. Like a Hurricane – Neil Young



13. Not Fade Away – Buddy Holly

Three Word Wednesday - 55 Flash Fiction Friday - 6/4/08

I have not submitted to 3WW on a regular basis. Sometimes I read the words and nothing immediately comes to mind. Then suddenly it is Thursday and I know that I am too late for anyone to read it. But I realize if I want to consider myself a writer of any value I must be able to write even when not inspired. So, today I challenged myself to complete a 12 Word Wednesday using the last four prompts that I did not respond to: blurred, illegal, match, deny, smile, uncomfortable, cautious, human, maybe, average, neck, and scratch. And to challenge myself further I made myself form the words into a 55 Flash Fiction Friday.

I have always been uncomfortable in my own skin. Maybe it is because my self-concept is blurred by my image of the average human, which I don’t match. I am cautious and seldom risk my neck. I have pretty much gone through life without a scratch, but I don’t deny myself an occasional illegal smile.

Wordless Wednesday - 6/4/08

Sunday Scribblings - "Curve" Writer's Island - "Extravaganza" 6/1/08

The initial response I get when I tell people I am originally from Idaho is invariably “oh, potatoes.” (That is if I am speaking to someone geographically savvy enough not to confuse Idaho with Iowa and start discussing corn) I guess identifying with potatoes is better than the other things Idaho is infamous for, Aryan Nations, the Ruby Ridge massacre, and a Senator Larry Craig's men's room reacharound. I will pause for a moment while the unfamiliar google these entries. Idaho is perhaps the most joked about state north of the Mason Dixon Line (I hope you don’t have to google that line of demarcation). Here are a few of my favorite Idaho jokes, though old:

This is the reining Miss Idaho
Why do most college football fields in Idaho use Astroturf? To keep the cheerleaders from grazing
What do you call a beautiful woman in Idaho? A tourist
Idaho is the only state with two capitals: Spokane and Salt Lake City. This is funny because neither is actually in Idaho but Spokane is the center of commerce for the northern part of the state and Salt Lake City is the location of the Mormon Church headquarters, which governs southern Idaho. That is a really funny joke if you can find Idaho on the map.

Anyway, you get the idea that Idaho is not the cultural center of the Universe. Well, that is not what my blog is about. The Sunday Scribblings prompt this week is “curve” and the Writer's Island prompt is "extravaganza". This is what I came up with:

Idaho is that weird shaped state that resembles an intoxicated person attempting the letter “L”. The north and south have very little in common, not even a time zone. I think it is important at this time to say that I am from northern Idaho. Potatoes do not grow in northern Idaho. It is all mountains and rivers and lakes and beauty, while the south is, well……potatoes. Northern Idaho is called the "panhandle". That is not because we hit up Washington and Montana for loose change, it is because of its narrowness.


It is nearly 500 miles from a very defendable border 50 mile border with Canada to the desolation that is Nevada and Utah. But you can't get there from here. Amazingly, due to terrain, there is only one highway that links the north and south without venturing deeply into Montana. It is US Highway 95. I did not say Interstate. No way. It is a mostly 2-lane highway that we motorists share with wildlife and stray domestic animals. Or at least it was when I lived there. It weaves its way over and around mountains. Real mountains. Not the hills passed off as mountains in the Appalachians. As you can see by the map, that 500 miles is not as the crow flies. Unless he is a crow with a very poor GPS.

The most hazardous stretch of Highway 95 was the 10-mile stretch dropping into the town of Lewiston driving south from Moscow. And dropping is the operative word here. It dropped 2,000 feet and included 64 turns. Many of these turns were hairpin curves with a surely fatal drop should a driver fail to negotiate one. Dale Earnhardt wouldn’t have exceeded 30 mph for much of the ride. Couple the dangerous road with the fact that snow and ice add an infinite degree of difficulty through the winter months as well as the probability of meeting an out-of-control logging truck on a narrow switchback.

There was a weekly extravaganza witnessed by the citizens below as headlights disappeared only to reappear in places there was no pavement. There were unrecoverable vehicle carcasses of failed attempts littering the valley below as well as sections of guardrail missing or severely disfigured marking departure points of those “getting air.” Though there were many other curvaceous stretches of US Highway 95, none could match the Lewiston Hill. I do not have numbers to support this claim but I am fairly certain there were more fatalities on this stretch of highway than the rest of Idaho’s portion of US Highway 95 combined.


I have been down that grade as a passenger of many school busses piloted by white-knuckled drivers and cars driven by chemically enhanced college students.

And your reward for making it to Lewiston was to be greeted by the foulest stench you can imagine from the pulp mill that was located there. I am fairly certain the EPA has probably curtailed that operation due to the pollutants.

The Lewiston Hill road was replaced with a straighter, much more user friendly highway in 1979. An extravagant gesture by a state that spends so little on highways that the only time potholes are filled is by ice in the winter months. I have only been down it a few times since then, but it is not nearly as exciting. Last I heard, the old road was still open for bicyclists and brain-dead tourists coming to Idaho to see potatoes.

Thursday 13 - Memories - 5/29/08

Thirteen memorable things I have done that did not cost money:

1. Seen the Northern Lights
2. Watched a Tornado
3. Seen a Total Eclipse
4. Watched a Night Space Shuttle Launch From the Beach
5. Slept Under the Stars
6. Floated the North Fork of the Coeurd’Alene River on inner tubes
7. Seen the Grand Canyon
8. Worked in a mine
9. Walked on Normandy Beach
10. Watched the sunrise in the “Land of the Rising Sun”
11. Lived in 6 Countries
12. Pitched 3 No-Hitters
13. Helped Evacuate Refugees at end of Vietnam war

Wordless Wednesday - Holding the Sun - 5/28/08

Sunday Scribblings - Quit - 5/25/08

No birth announcements purchased
No choice of pink or blue
No photos on the mantle
Of a child they never knew

Never had a birthday party
Never took that initial walk
Never colored outside the lines
Never learned to read or talk

Might have been a friend to Jesus
Might have been Satan’s spawn
Might have been a poet or teacher
Or the one who cuts your lawn

Might have been somebody’s lover
Might have been somebody’s pain
Might have saved the world from hardship
Might have been its sad refrain

Never got a chance to flourish
Never got a chance to lose
Never got a chance at life
Never got a chance to choose

Might have been somebody famous
Might have been no one of note
No memories or mementos
Just this painful anecdote

But they quit before she started
They quit before he had a voice
They quit before he drew his first breath
They quit because they had a choice

Thursday 13 - Favorite Movie Franchises - 5/22/08

My initial list had about 40 just off the top of my head, so I had to whittle down. I restricted the list to franchises that consisted of at least three films. That eliminated such favorites of mine as: Grumpy Old Men, Arthur, Clerks, Wayne's World, Ace Ventura, Bill and Ted, Meet the Parents, and Men in Black. Then I had to trim more so I reluctantly lost Superman (Christopher Reeves versions), Rocky, National Lampoon, Star Wars, Rush Hour, Star Trek, Alien, Oh God, James Bond (Sean Connery only), X-men, Death Wish, The Matrix, Austin Powers, Shrek, Oceans 11, Mission Impossible, and Batman (too many Batmen). So I ended up by choosing the ones I would want to watch right now. My favorite movie franchises in no particular order:

1. Monty Python – One of the greatest comedy ensembles ever. They made several great movies. My kind of humor.
2. The Terminator – Classic Arnold Schwarzenegger. Great story line.
3. Die Hard – John McClane is one of the best action movie characters ever developed. Just enough smart-ass for my liking.
4. Lethal Weapon – Characters much more important than plot. Joe Pesci was great.
5. Clint Eastwood Spaghetti Westerns – Loved them all. My favorite cowboy ever.
6. Dirty Harry – Some of the most memorable quotes ever: “Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?” Pretty obvious I love Clint Eastwood movies.
7. Back to the Future – Fun movies, Christopher Lloyd as Doc Brown, no better character actor.
8. The Godfather – Amazing story, paved the way for the Sopranos.
9. Pirates of the Caribbean – Johnny Depp might be the best actor on the planet. He can make anything watchable.
10. Harry Potter – Captivating stories overshadow horrible child actors.
11. Lord of the Rings – My favorite story ever brought to life with fantastic on-location scenery.
12. Indiana Jones – Most unlikely action hero ever. Can’t wait for the new one to open.
13. Jack Ryan Movies – Written by Tom Clancy. Patriot Games, Hunt for Red October, Clear and Present Danger, and The Sum of All Fears. Harrison Ford was my favorite Jack Ryan.

I would like to hear yours.

Three Word Wednesday - delayed, edge, focus - 5/21/08

Both of you who regularly read my blog know that I grew up in northern Idaho. At the same time a friend of mine, of about the same age, was growing up in North Carolina. The south was dealing with integration, desegregation, civil rights demonstrations, and violence generated by racism. I saw accounts of it on the television, but as with a lot of things that did not directly affect me, I basically ignored it. It was another world.

The only diversity that I was confronted was that some of my classmates had brown eyes. I noticed that in the 2000 census, Idaho was down to only 95 per cent white. A regular melting pot, we were (that sounded like Yoda). Oh, we had some Native American and Mexican students, but we really didn’t notice. The darkest skinned kid among us was Paul Richter. His photo is here. Though he had a very vile ethnic nickname (which I will not reveal here), he used his number 2 pencil to shade in the “white” circle on his SATs.

Most of us were third or fourth generation European immigrants with names like Dorendorf, Rinaldi, Birchmeier, McCoy, Burkhart, Blickensderfer (I think that is German for beautiful), VanHoose, Eixenberger, Wainright, Jasberg, Arnhold, and Schonewald. Our parents worked in the mines and forests.

My friend remembers white-only bathrooms and water fountains. Black people could not eat in restaurants, (my friend lived very near the Greensboro Woolworth sit in http://americanhistory.si.edu/Brown/history/6-legacy/freedom-struggle-2.html), were herded into the balconies of movie theaters, were banned from public swimming pools, and had to enter through the back door of businesses they were allowed into. I cannot relate to this. It seems impossible to me to fathom. Isn’t this America? Instead of worrying about the effect of the Berlin Wall, perhaps Eisenhower and Kennedy (Ich bin ein RACIST) should have looked at the apartheid in this country. Oh, that's right, blacks did not have the right to vote in the elections of either of these presidents. You do the math. But I digress.












I have since come to understand a bit more of what the south went through, particularly as it deals with education. During the hundred years of segregation following the civil war, each school district had to fund two separate schools. One black and one white. Since the south was very poor, that meant two underfunded and ineffective schools. Unfortunately for the black students, what scant funding there was ended up mostly in the white schools. Education was not paramount as about the only employment available was in textile mills and agriculture. One did not need to know the Pythagorean Theorem to prepare for a life of picking cotton or tobacco or making bedspreads.

In 1965, the schools were integrated and the black schools were closed. (Even though Brown vs The Board of Education, banning segregation, became law in 1954, its implementation was delayed in the south)

When the students were combined, it was found that the black students, through no fault of their own, were behind the white students. As a result, at least in my friend’s school, there was a distinct dumbing down of the white students to allow black students to catch up. The black students were pushed through with their age group. Students graduated with my friend that could not even read, let alone read at grade-level. The sons of wealthy white families had the alternative of private military school. But the girls, such as my friend, had no options.

My friend received a substandard education in North Carolina, while in Idaho I had the opportunity for a well-rounded and comprehensive education. I had some great teachers and facilities. Though through my own inattentiveness and fragmented focus I did not take full advantage of what was afforded me, I learned a lot by osmosis. If you throw enough paint at a canvas, you will eventually get a painting.

My friend is very intelligent but largely uneducated. As a result, she thinks of herself as dumb and lacks confidence. It greatly saddens me. She was a canvas that was never painted on. Of course, the upside is she mistakenly thinks I am smart. Who would have guessed that growing up in the wilds of Northern Idaho would give me an academic edge over anyone?

Sunday Scribblings/Writer's Island - "Soar/Impulsive" - 5/18/08

This weeks prompts for Sunday Scribblings and Writer's Island were soar and impulsive, respectively. I am much too lazy to write two posts. This is my response to both.


















I DON'T WANT AN ANGEL
WHO'S NEVER MADE MISTAKES
NEVER SUFFERED HUMAN FAILINGS
ALWAYS LIVED FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE

I DON'T WANT AN ANGEL
ADORNED IN BRILLIANT WHITE
WITH VIRGIN HEART UNBROKEN
HAVING ALWAYS DONE WHAT'S RIGHT

I DON'T WANT AN ANGEL
WHO'S NEVER SUCCUMBED TO DESIRES
NEVER HEEDED TO IMPULSIVE CRAVINGS
OR BEEN CONSUMED BY FERVENT FIRES

I DON'T WANT AN ANGEL
AFRAID TO GIVE HERSELF TO ME
NOT KNOWING HOW TO MAKE ME FEEL
LIKE THE MAN I LONG TO BE

I DON'T WANT AN ANGEL
SHE MIGHT FLUTTER WHEN I HOLD HER TIGHT
AND SPREAD HER WINGS AND SOAR AWAY
WHEN I NEED HER IN THE NIGHT

I DON'T WANT AN ANGEL
THAT HUNGER HAS NEVER POSSESSED
THAT'S NEVER KNOWN THE SALACIOUS PLEASURE
OF FORBIDDEN LOVE'S CARESS

I DON'T WANT AN ANGEL
JUST THE IMPERFECT SOUL THAT'S YOU
FOR WITH NOTHING TO COMPARE MY LOVE
YOU CAN'T KNOW THAT IT'S TRUE

I KNOW YOU'RE NOT AN ANGEL
AND A SAINT I’LL NEVER BE
I'LL REMOVE YOUR RING OF LIGHT
TAKE THE CROWN OF THORNS FROM ME

Thursday 13 - Favorite Quotes - 5/15/08

There was apparently no theme this week so I came up with my own. That will teach you. My topic this week is some of my favorite quotations. I tried, unsuccessfully, to limit myself to 13, but as I am an undisciplined lout, that was impossible. None of these deserved to be cut. It took a lot of effort to prune my list to those listed below:

1. Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. ...Albert Einstein

2. The nice part of living in a small town is that when I don't know what I'm doing, someone else does. ....Source Unknown

3. Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names. ....John F. Kennedy

4. If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting? ...Stephen Levine

5. Bigamy is having one spouse too many. Monogamy is the same. ...Oscar Wilde

6. I went to the American School of Redundancy School ...Jack A. Goodman

7. Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra. ...Fran Lebowitz

8. Never contend with a man who has nothing to lose. ...Baltazar Gracian, The Art of Worldly Wisdom, 1647

9. Just because you have a computer, doesn't mean you can't be stupid. ...Beavis and Butthead

10. The Ten Commandments contain 297 words. The Bill of Rights is stated in 463 words. Lincoln's Gettysburg Address contains 266 words. A recent federal directive to regulate the price of cabbage contains 26,911 words. ...Atlanta Journal

11. (A journalist asked if there was room for forgiveness toward the people who abetted the 9/11 terrorist attacks against America.)

I believe that forgiving them is God's function. Our job is simply to arrange the meeting. ...General Norman Schwartzkopf

12. Believe those who are seeking the truth; doubt those who find it. ...ANDRE GIDE

13. When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years. ...Mark Twain

14. If the other person injures you, you may forget the injury; but if you injure him you will always remember. ....Kahlil Gibran

15. A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. ....Robert Frost

16. A casual stroll through a lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything. ...Fredrick Nietzsche

17. No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible ...Voltaire

18. It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried. ...Winston Churchill

19. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. ....George Carlin

Wordless Wednesday - Led Zeppelin Roller Coaster - 5/14/08

Thursday Thirteen - Gross Words - 5/8/08

The prompt this week is gross. The following are words that are gross to me. Words that are considereed profanity are not included. That would be too easy. Some of these words will appear gross even if you do not know the definition. They are in no order of grossness. There are many more but these came to mind.

1. Phlegm
2. Pus
3. Mucus
4. Queef
5. Septic
6. Sewage
7. Fecal
8. Laceration
9. Prepuce
10. Lesion
11. Pungent
12. Putrid
13. Seepage

Wordless Wednesday - Fear the Chicken - 5/7/08

Sunday Scribblings - Family - 5/04/08

This week's prompt is "Family".




Warmth when it is cold outside
Smells of chicken frying
Bandages on playground wounds
A hug when I am crying

Proud applause, forgotten lines
A rabbit in a a 3rd grade play
Trying to guess what’s beneath the tree
Long before Christmas day

Risking grievous bodily harm
By wearing brother’s clothes
Giving mother dandelions
She accepted as a rose

Inspecting sister’s first boyfriend
And teasing her for years
Striking out to lose the game
Dad wiped away the tears

But he doesn’t give up on me
Or let me lose my nerve
He pitches to me for hours
‘til I learn to hit the curve

In a hard and hateful world
Where no one seems to care
When I feel I have no friends
My family’s always there

Waving hands and tear-filled eyes
At the airport departure gate
Goodbye to one that’s leaving
It’s those moments we all hate

Though we scatter ‘cross the globe
We’re still of the same heart
And we are still a family
Though we’re many miles apart

City Daily Photo - Numbers - 5/3/08

I stumbled across a unique prompt at Crazy Cow. City Daily Photo gives a monthly prompt and you supply a photo of your city that you feel matches the prompt. The prompt this month is "numbers". I think these numbers say it all. And we, in South Carolina, usually enjoy the lowest gas prices in the country.

Thursday 13 - #143 - The "F" Words - 5/1/08

The prompt was to pick a letter of the alphabet and pick 13 words beginning with that letter that I believe describes me. It was difficult to censor it and limit it to 13 words since I am such a funny fat fucker.

1. Fastidious
2. Free-thinking
3. Fescennine
4. Father
5. Forthright
6. Fifty-Five
7. Flatulent
8. Frugal
9. Faineant
10. Frank
11. Facile
12. Fretful
13. Friendly